A History Of The Communist Party

Comrades,

It all began late in the month of September 007. Something about the phrase 'Communist Party' caught my attention one day, and I began to ponder the possibilities. Five months later, my visions of revolution became reality.
With the help of my fellow party leaders, we transformed #107 into glorious Communist Party Headquarters.
Comrade Kulish was commissioned to create the artwork, and we arranged for certain books to be burned.
Cold Wars were fought.
and The People were reeducated as necessary. If you wonder why Papa Smurf is featured on the wall, look here.
The food was modest but glorious:


We raised the Berlin wall once more (and thanks to Comrade Stephens, both Joseph Smith & Che graced it. Only in Tijuana can you find velvet paintings of both in the same frame).
Mr. Atomic also received prominent placement - behold the technological fruits of all our Cold War efforts!
A corner for interrogation was essential.
I had emailed assignments to party members. Some were asked to be agents of propaganda and reeducation. Others were to bring bread. Five received this email:

Comrades,

Yours is a very special assignment on this eve of the revolution. While you will come to the Communist Party dressed as loyal Communists of whatever flavor you choose, you will be stealthily disguising your true identity as CIA operatives. These are the details you must know:

There are five of you.

Your job is to coordinate an assassination attempt on one of the speakers for the evening. Comrade Erin Rains and Comrade Jeff Stephens are both scheduled to give impassioned, volatile speeches at approximately 21:37 and 22:42, respectively. If desired, a nerf gun is available for use and will be hidden within the south wing bathroom.

In order to find one another, you will need to initiate conversations about the hairstyles of some of Our Great Communist Leaders. You will recognize your fellow operatives when the codeword POMADE is used.

Good luck, and may the power of light and liberty be with you (secretly, of course).
Agent CompTron

Five others received this email:

Comrades,

Yours is a very, very special assignment on the eve of this revolution. It is rumored that there may be an assassination attempt on one of the two speakers - Comrade Erin Rains and Comrade Jeff Stephens - scheduled to speak at our glorious party. As KGB operatives (overt or clandestine, as you choose), it is your duty to do all you can to prevent this from happening.

There will likely be several CIA agents in attendance at the party; they must be located and prevented from doing harm to either of our noble party members. Please be vigilant as you watch for any suspicious behaviors as the capitalist spies attempt to organize their efforts. You are empowered to use the interrogation facilities as necessary. All the resources of the party are at your disposal in order to maintain the security and integrity our revolution needs.

Good night and good luck.
Comrade CompTron

This drama began to play out even before the party had begun. KGB Agents Allred and McNett created several false email addresses and sent emails to party attendees, fishing for information. One such email from a comradecomptron@gmail.com fooled many. And at the party, IDs in hand, these agents took their roles seriously, interrogating many.



Their methodology proved effective as they thwarted an assassination attempt on Sandinista Rains after her rousing speech (all en espanol). See the results:


Later, an arms race was held. This particular arms race involved arm wrestling and pullups in order to determine whose arms would be the strongest to include in a revolutionary propaganda shot.
A 2-minute hate focused our attentions before the final speech of the evening. This hate was focused on an easter peep - offensive capitalist fluff!
(Comrade Atom, on the eve of his birthday, led the hate.)
And then - the Rosenbergs spoke. Pandemonium ensued:


The party was attended by a wide cast of characters.
Mini Mao made an appearance,
as did Fidel.
Peasants of all stripes gathered,
including Comrade Bubonichkova.

Sara Elliskova embodied communism itself.
Mr. Rosenberg and Vladimir....
....and so many more.






All hail the glorious revolution!

Sharing is what communists do, and my little red heart couldn't be happier that you all shared so much Awesome with The Party.