you dream big when you live in Barstow.

I used to live in the desert. I dreamed of being a cowgirl, running horses around barrels, wearing fringy leather jackets with matching boots. And I had too much time on my hands in my first few years of elementary school, which led to writing ridiculous stories pretty frequently.
transcribed (1986): "Magic Boots" (author's note: I used the back [of the paper])

This is how I found out my boots were magic. First thing I jumped into my boots. Next thing I know I'm walking out the door. My boots carried me to the West. I didn't like it there. There were horses running around and one of them kicked me. There were cowboys shootin' [ed. note: I put that apostrophe there when I was 6.]. The sun was hot. After West there was North. North was cold and a walrus bit me. I fell in the snow. Then the badest thing happened and this was it: my boots stopped! I had [to walk] all the way back! I walked one week and then I was home and that is how my boots are magic.

Last week, I finished Cormac McCarthy's Blood Meridian, watched The Good, The Bad and the Ugly, listened to Ennio Morricone's score for a couple days straight, and wondered where exactly my dreams of breaking a wild stallion and riding it west into the sunset had gone. Maybe it was the thought of being bitten by a walrus that did me in. Hard to say.

defined

1991: age 10, anxious to glimpse the contours of my destiny, I ventured to the Valley Plaza Mall with a friend. The 'unlock the mystery of your name' kiosk had me sold when I saw that I could have the insights printed on a killer whale background.

recent fascinations

1. Princess Hijab, a young Parisian guerrilla artist who "hijabizes" advertisements in order to "subvert consumer images—especially of women—and to push cultural boundaries".


2. Leila Khaled, a rather foxy Palestinian who was part of a team that hijacked TWA Flight 840 on its way from Rome to Athens in 1969. She's now a member of the Palestinian National Council, as well as the subject of a recent Swedish documentary that I can't get ahold of.

3. The Okapi, a very shy and solitary "forest giraffe" found in rainforests of the upper Congo River Basin in central Africa. This nocturnal animal was one of the last mammals discovered by scientists in the early 1900's.

in the words of Celine Dion, "A New Day Has Come"

A perfect Martin Luther King Jr. Day concluded with making shirts for the inauguration tomorrow. More on this soon.

America! is the name of a shop in the Washington Dulles airport. The ! means we really really like America.

2008 was a good year for seeing new places:
Upstate NY & Canada
Vermont, New Hampshire, Montreal and Quebec
Edison Lake, CA
Yemen
Jordan
Jerusalem, the West Bank and the Golan Heights
Syria
Lebanon
Cairo, Egypt
London, England
Zion National Park, Utah
and, bridging the transition from 008 to 009:
Washington DC, Virginia, Maryland, Pennsylvania, West Virginia, New Jersey, Delaware

(it was also a good year for concerts, by the way. My top 4:
- Neil Diamond at the Hollywood Bowl
- Beck at the Nokia Theatre
- Amr Diab in Damascus
- Angelique Kidjo at the citadel in Damascus)

Because it's already the middle of January, I'll spare the blow-by-blow anecdotes of the recent road trip to DC and just share some photos of the adventure:

BALTIMORE, MARYLAND
A charming city bursting with happiness at the Ravens' recent successes. Also, home to more churches than I could shake a stick at, and plenty of religiously-themed hair salons as well (the sign on the window below says giving your hair everlasting life, through the body of Christ. ?!).


WASHINGTON, DC
Thanks, Dax, for the epic walking tour of the monuments by moonlight. And let it be known that Abraham Lincoln made my heart sing with patriotism and hope.


Thank you, Smithson, for your generous grant to the People of America. The Air and Space Museum, the Natural History Museum, and the American History Museum pretty much blew my mind. Space shuttles! The Hope Diamond! A Giant Squid! Dinosaurs! Quelle delight indeed.


I've been waiting to see the Vietnam War Memorial since I was 11. I was not disappointed.
Arlington National Cemetery also proved to be quite moving.


VIRGINIA AND WEST VIRGINIA
Sing along with John Denver and me in my rented Mustang as I drive from Harpers Ferry in WV all the way down Skyline Drive: "Blue Ridge Mountains, Shenandoah River...Take me home, country roads, to the place I belONG! West Virginia, mountain mama, take me home, country roads!"




PENNSYLVANIA
Gettysburg is incredible.

Intercourse, Pennyslvania is also pretty great. But not on Sundays, when the Amish aren't working or selling homemade rootbeer or fresh churned butter. Darn it.

Philadelphia, however, might have been the biggest and most surprising gem of my eastern adventure. A ridiculously fantastic city with a fascinating history, some blend of the vibes of NY and Riga, more community-painted murals than any other city on earth, original King James Bibles, random statues, cheesesteaks, and friends (I love Preethi and Dan) who happen to be the best tour guides east of the Mississippi.







As a bonus, I'll include SAN FRANCISCO, where Jessica and I quickly roadtripped this weekend. Stop at Pea Soup Andersen's next time you're headed north, and ask Jessica about the best taco place in Gilroy too.

Looking forward to more adventures - and better adventure reporting - during this fine new year. Might be hard to beat Yemen, though. I'll see what I can do.

merry christmas, jäger

Jäger is my dad's dog, a white German Shepherd search and rescuer who responds to commands auf Deutsch and loves chasing sticks (spuchen is what you say when you want him to spit out his stick so you can throw it again).

If you give him a squeaky sheep, it will take him less than 14 minutes to happily disembowel it.

december pleasantries

These are some things I celebrate this time o' year, aside from the One Overarching Really Important Thing That Christmas Is All About:

Christmases past:

(including a post-white elephant gift exchange Darren's Dance Grooves session a couple years back)

The happiest place on earth:
(finding your names - Tron!, Wendy! - at the top of Santa's list, held by the noblest creature of all, the goat)
(teacups running over)

Grand And Glorious Gatherings:
(with Richard Simmons)
(Sunday Breast: Winter Edition)
(Santa Monica Silvers winning 56-35. 1 TFL for me! amazing!)(Jasminehood)
(Goatmasters)

Christmas music:


(the kind that puts everyone to sleep at 03:00)

And KataTronic Christmas Monsters, of course (with Kristen's invaluable aid):

Christmas eve activities:
As I write, Dino and Mush are combing through the question cards of the Worst Case Scenario Survival Board Game. I have learned the following:

- how to treat someone struck by lightning
- to "smack a crocodile on its snout, and stab a shark in the eye. don't confuse the two," says PapaTron
- how to eat polar bear meat: AVOID THE LIVER! it contains a lethal dose of vitamin A.
- how to eat a frog: FALSE!
- how to breathe during a freefall while parachuting: actually, you do not need to breathe at all through your mouth or nose. you will breathe through your skin. (?!?!)

We also performed extensive psychological evaluations that resulted in effective Hogwarts house sorting for the folks here. Check out this test, or this one for a much shorter sorting experience.

Results:
Dad and Julie - both resounding Huffleclaws.
Mush - Gryffindor, with a strong Slytherin streak.
Dino - Gryffindor with strong Hufflepuff AND Ravenclaw tendencies. Further testing necessary.
Wendy - a Ravenpuff (see me personally for further very strong opinions about all this sorting business).

Essentially: general happiness abounds.